I Am a Body Shamer

I live in a body shaming culture and it’s in this context that I’ve lived my whole life as a figurative sculptor, trying to overcome the tendency of many viewers to sexualize what I do. I’ve noticed that over the years I’ve drifted away from depicting figures that could be sexualized more easily. And this troubles me. I too am damaged by the culture.

We are all damaged in different ways, but mine is unique because of my profession. I would guess that I’m the only figurative sculptor you know, so it could be that I have a useful perspective. Or I may simply irritate you. You decide.

Recently I placed an ad for models for a class I’m teaching in Figure Drawing. I usually get a number of “beautiful”, trim young women and perhaps one trim young man replying. (This tells me that only such people would dare risk being exposed). Then I got a reply and photos from the mother of a young woman who was starting a modeling career and wanted to model. I replied that she looked pretty young to me and she’d have to sign for the girl unless she was 18. Turns out she’s 12! So I replied that I would consider it after she turns 16 (age of consent in Montana) and only if the mom was present.

This offer caused some ire among the women of my family. They’re alarmed that any mom would offer her daughter like that and found it very creepy. I can see why, but I argue that young people–– and especially girls–– need to have some experience of exposure in a group (like the group showers we had in my school days) in order to feel what a non-sexual body exposure feels like; because we are exposed way too much to sexualized exposure (almost the only way we experience bodies in this culture!)

Now that the showers in our schools stand unused, I worry that kids won’t ever have a non-sexualized experience of exposing their bodies. You may say that’s not needed. I wonder how otherwise a child will ever be introduced to a non-sexual body or gain a sense of body-esteem without some such exposure. In Europe there is nudity on some beaches, nudes in the architecture and partly naked kids appear in ads there, apparently without the culture nosediving into depravity. I think the reason is that there’s less fear of nudity and sexual exploitation. 

We of course want to protect our kids! I have a 10-year-old daughter that’s been sexually abused and I will protect her with my life! But that doesn’t mean I want to keep her from experiencing others’ non-sexual appreciation of her body. I feel it would help her to know what an exploitive situation feels like so she could resist it the more fervently. I expect you to disagree, so then let me ask you some questions.

If you yourself would not expose your body to a group (say, modeling for an art class) can you truly say that your body esteem is in good shape? You may say it’s just a matter of privacy, but do you feel the same of some lovely painting in your house? Why would you not want to show something beautiful to a group that is gathered for that very purpose? If you reply that it’s just your preference, I would say this is evidence of the sexualizing of the body in our culture. If you think the only person you want to share your body image with is your significant other, then you’ve sexualized your nudity; that’s its only value and the only circumstance under which you would share it.

So how would it feel to you if you were to be exposed and the others’ response was “Oh, what a beautiful human that is!” ?? You might say, I’d never do that!, but then I ask again, what is the thing you’re protecting, is it your actual self-esteem, or are you simply retreating into the safety of our Shame Culture?

Another tricky question: Do you think images in art of naked children should be banned? Most would say no. To those I would ask, how are those images then to be formed? Is the sight of a child’s body so dangerous and we adults so flawed that we have to ban artists from using naked children as models? Here most would say yes. So then, under what circumstances can such art be made? I don’t ask these questions looking for clever answers, but to invite you to wrestle seriously with the kinds of issues I’ve struggled with for decades. (I made a sculpture of a naked boy in the 80’s that now troubles me because the culture has changed. Now what?? Another has been veiled for 34 years because I can find no public institution that will agree to unveil it.)

This struggle has similarities to the racial struggle of 100 years ago. Then the whole culture was comfortably racist (for us white folks), and it was easy to say, oh well, that’s just the way things are. Many of us today would like to see a more body-positive culture (we’re making progress!), but that’s just the way things are. I believe that the human body was inalianably created good and beautiful. Sex is a gift but not the body’s purpose or destiny. In a sexualized culture, we are all sickened. More than responding I’m not a shamer, it’s helpful to say “I too am a body shamer, but want to heal”. In this context I say I long for a day when a person is judged not by their skin but by the content of their character!

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